36 Comments

  1. Thank you so much for this. I’ve been overwhelmed for so long, and I keep feeling hopeless that I simply cannot ‘redeem the time’. I’m just so tired and constantly feeling defeated. But reading this, and a few of your other posts today has given me hope. I realize now that it’s not that I don’t have the time, it’s simply that I’m using it for things that just are distractions. I am in control of my own choices, I don’t have to be a victim of them! It might seem silly but this is really a big revelation to me and I just thank you so much for what a blessing your blog has been to me.

    1. I totally understand. I always struggle with distractions. One day at a time!

  2. THIS. IS. MY. LIFE. I swear you could have been describing how I feel right now. I have a 6 & 3 year old. I am a single mother. I have been blessed to stay home with them this long! But it feels as if I am just drowning in motherhood. I lost me along the way. I am always tired, usually impatient, often crabby, and yell entirely too much. I hear the “I miss those days” and “you’re gonna regret not…” so much. I sometimes catch myself missing these days even while they are going on. I want to be more present, more patient, more involved. I’m just so exhausted…mentally, emotionally, physically. I am trying to slow down and just love them and love this stage in their lives. I am trying to appreciate the little things. I miss my babies being babies. I even miss the late night feedings. I miss all the snuggles (oh how I treasure those when I get them!!!) and I miss the dependence on me. I started realizing that there were so many things that seemed to be “lasts” for me. When was the last time my 6 year old wanted help getting dressed? When was the last time he wanted help brushing his teeth? When was the last time he wanted me to sing him to sleep? When was the last time he needed help in the bathroom? He is growing up right before my eyes and I am missing it! (Yes I may be crying while writing this LOL) Thank you for reminding me that I am not alone in this and giving me a reminder to just slow down and appreciate my kids because 1 day, they won’t be my little babies anymore and I will miss this!!!

  3. Just like I look at pregnant woman when I am not pregnant and think how beautiful it is now that I am pregnant with my 4th I am reminded how hard and exhausting it is. I am miserable and just try to enjoy the little moments of cute baby kicks when I can. I’ve been at home with 3 kids (youngest is a 2 year old) all summer long and I’m about to lose my mind. Husband works long hours too. This is not how we as humans are meant to raise children. Alone in our homes. It is tiring and lonely. But there is no village anymore to raise your child. It is just you and your spouse. Just like I forgot how hard it is to be pregnant people forget how hard it is to be a lonely parent. Don’t feel bad about doing what you have to do to survive. There are great moments even on the worst day but there are more difficult moments. It is OK just to survive sometimes.

  4. What a sweet post. Mothering is exhausting and wonderful. I think you captured that perfectly. When I start hearing the same message from several different sources, I always take the message to heart and try to soak it in. I love that the message and will try hard to remember it in my day to day.

  5. Kayse,

    Just glancing through the comments above as I scrolled to leave mine, it is so apparent how so “not alone” you are in these feelings. I remember them well. My youngest is now 16 and my oldest is married. I recently started writing to parents of teens and it was like flies to honey. People wanting to identify and be encouraged. Parenting is the one thing we feel like we must get right because these little people depend on it. But it’s not all up to you and you are wise beyond your years to circle back to the source of your strength. God uses the less-than-perfect, the poor choices, and the outright failures to develop character in His children: both you and yours 🙂

    Keep swimmin’, sweet sister in Christ. And admit when you’re drowning. As you’ve seen, so many are encouraged by the honesty. And never forget that you aren’t alone in this journey.

    Embracing the Journey and looking forward to more of your “TuesTalk posts. You writing is beautiful.

    Christi

  6. So I applaud you for taking a step back and not rolling your eyes and saying, “Easy for YOU to say, you’re not living in my messed up moment”, because I used to. I hated hearing those kinds of comments because I just knew they had no idea and were too far removed. Well, I’m there now (mom of four, last one’s almost out of the house, recent Gigi chasing the tiny tornado most days while mama works) and guess what. IT’S ALL TRUE. It’s true that you’re exhausted (I’m exhausted when tornado leaves each evening), and it’s true these are the best years of your life. Live in the moment, Laugh throughout the day at all the funny things they do and say, and Love them like CRAZY. Because it does end and oh, how you miss it (and the good health that comes with youth)! Hang in there, mom. I love what you’re doing here. You’re my people. 🙂

  7. I can totally relate to your post, and my kids are older! I have so much going on right now that I know I am snapping and yelling more than I should. I needed to read this today. Thanks for the great reminders! Visiting from the Tuesday talk linkup.

  8. I remember those days. My kids are the same age span as yours are, and can I just encourage you? Sometimes, we don’t really thoroughly appreciate these years until they are past. When my kids were that age, I was physically exhausted. The one year old that is now mobile but has neither fear nor any sense of self-preservation, is it’s own type of exhaustion! As they get older, the exhaustion shows up in different ways – more emotionally and mentally. Every stage has its challenges and blessings.It’s also okay to need a break, too. ((hugs)).

    This will sound totally counter-intuitive, but when I needed a break, I actually invited other people’s kids to my house! I know that sounds crazy, but it usually worked like a charm. The kids would play with each other and I would be able to breathe a little while I watched. Another idea is that once a week 2 other moms and I exchanged kids. They BOTH had twins and I only had a one, but every two weeks, I’d take 5 kids for the morning. The moms would come for them around noon, and we’d all eat lunch together (I usually made mac n cheese). It was totally worth it! While it’s important to realize our blessings, it’s also important to take care of ourselves (including our sanity!). I hope and pray you can find a way to get some breathing room once in a while. 🙂

  9. I so appreciate this. The reminder that we’ll miss these years is such a attitude-changer. Thank you!

  10. What a great reminder! I really needed this today! We just adopted a newborn last week, so we’ve been transitioning from 2 to 3 kids (all under 3.5 years old!). We’re very excited and happy, but it’s exhausting too. Thanks for the inspiration! And thanks for linking up with us today for Tuesday Talk. I’m going to feature this post on our Pinterest board! -Jess
    http://www.sweetlittleonesblog.com

  11. My husband works off and we don’t get to see him much except when life slows down enough for us to escape to see him. I’m working towards being able to travel with him full time but for now I take what I can get. I have my 1 yr old and 6 year old constantly and sometimes I feel I’m going to break. I try so hard to just enjoy them but sometimes it seems I’m too weary. Some homeschool days overwhelm me, my 1 year seemsto dig in all things not good for her & i just want to sit and cry but I have learned to pause & pray and ask God to lead me. I don’t want to be known as the mom who expected perfection and yelled when it didn’t happen. I want to extend the same grace God gives me when I fail. God bless! Awesome reminder!

  12. Kayse, you really spoke to my heart with this post. I feel the same way! Thank you for putting what I’m feeling into words sweet friend 🙂 I’m going to feature this post this week for Family Fun Friday!

  13. I could cry reading this because there are some days that this is my story! I think God sends people our way like the sweet lady in Panera to give us little reminders as we are in the trenches that through the weariness to look for the joy and soak it up! I have had to make changes and discipline myself to wake up early for quiet time & a cup of coffee, to turn the computer off when the kids get home etc! Love that you shared your heart! Love your blog, I am now following you! I would love for you to share this over at my new link party Making Memories Mondays going on now!
    Cathy

  14. Thanks for this, Kayse. This is exactly where I’m at. I needed the reminder to cherish today.

  15. Finish well. Yes that’s what I would like, to finish well. I completely understand your wanted space and time and freedom and just to be able to “be”. I’m grateful for the reminders to take advantage of this precious time we have with our kids knowing that it’s fleeting. Praying along with you. Thanks for sharing. 🙂

  16. I absolutely loved this article, and your other posting on taking on too much. I am SO there right now! I work a few hours a week in our church nursery, run our MOPS ministry, recently started a blog (because I needed one more thing!), and have my two little ones on top of that. All of those extra things I do sometimes overtake the pure and simple joy of being a mother to my beautiful children. They truly are a treasure, but it can be tough to see it when you are knee deep in the everyday.

    I think I am going to write this one down, “And here I am, trying to escape my kids, when God brings the gentle reminder that I will miss these days. That these days matter.”

    Thank you for passing on his gentle reminder. I needed it today!

  17. I am starting into a season that will be 24/7 exhausting and I feel like I’m having a poor attitude about it right now. I saw many parallels to the life you explained. Minus the stomach virus (sorry…). Super busy husband, a 3.5 year old that can test my patience and completely hands-on, busy one-year old…

    This was a great reminder for me today. Thanks!

    1. Praying for endurance for you during this season!

  18. Hannah Beth Reid says:

    Thank you SO MUCH for this post! I’ve had a lot of those feelings lately and this really touched my heart. I’m glad others can write out the feelings and thoughts in an understandable and encouraging way! Keep it up!

  19. I think we’re all sometimes tired of being a mom..

  20. fantabulous. I already miss the baby stage, I have to believe I will miss the two year old stage. I have to believe that God is with me and HE is really the strength and wisdom, not me!

    1. So true. I am so enjoying the toddler season with Nathan but I know 2-3 is coming and that scares me! 😉

  21. Thank you for this post. I have felt the same way for a while. Being a Mom is exhausting, a night and day 24/7 thing that is gone before I am going to know it. I have twin 4 year old boys who I love to pieces. I am a dairy farmer, wife, Mom and in charge of everything that has to do with the farm and my house(personal stuff). Some days I just want to crawl into a space that is all mine and nobody can find me, so I can have that cup of coffee in silence. Or I want to sleep the entire night from start to end as 3:30 am comes way too early, but I don’t know what I would do without someone yelling at me because they can’t find their teddy bear or needs a drink of water at 1:30am. When life gets me down and I think I am going to drown in it all I have to remind myself that in a few years they wont need me to be doing all this stuff for them. They will be driving that tractor without me and I will be sitting here asking myself where did time go. Thank you so much for these words, I am glad I am not alone on this journey call life.

  22. Oh, I know that drowning feeling. I’m proud of you for hearing the lady in Panera and your dad. I’m proud of your for always being willing to learn how to do life better. You encourage other mommas (me!) so well. AND thanks for including my post up there. xoxo

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