The one skill we need to be teaching our kids in today’s culture.

I was washing the conditioner out of my hair when Emily came barging into the bathroom.

“Hey mom! Can we pleeeeeeeease watch My Little Pony? PLEEEEEEEASE???”

Up until that point, we’d said no to the multi-colored ponies on Netflix. We had watched them together once before, and right afterward, Emily started acting like one of the ponies… the one with an attitude.

And that was enough for me.

But this morning, I thought about my daughter, who is growing up into a young lady learning to make good choices, and my reply changed.

“I’ll say yes right now, Emmy. On one condition.”

“YESSSS!!!!”

“One condition. Are you listening? Here it is. While you watch, I want you to pay attention to their attitudes. Are they kind to one another? Are they helping each other, or are they tearing each other down? Is this show a lovely, good, true story to watch? If so, you can keep watching. If not, I am going to trust you to turn it off.”

She agreed, and began walking away.

“Emily!” I called her back. “Do you know what that’s called – watching a show or reading a book and examining it to see if it’s worth watching or reading? Do you know what that’s called?”

“Nope,” she replied, eager to get the show started.

“That’s called discernment, honey. And it’s one of the most important things you’ll ever learn.”

What is discernment, anyway?

“In its simplest definition, discernment is nothing more than the ability to decide between truth and error, right and wrong. Discernment is the process of making careful distinctions in our thinking about truth. In other words, the ability to think with discernment is synonymous with an ability to think biblically.” – John MacArthur

Discernment is the ability to think critically, determining whether or not something aligns with your beliefs.

Discernment is a form of listening, praying, and drawing your conclusions based on Scripture.

I love Charles Spurgeon’s definition most of all: “Discernment is not knowing the difference between right and wrong. It is knowing the difference between right and almost right.”

Discernment is something today’s kids are seriously lacking.

Why do our kids need discernment?

From deciding what show to watch on Netflix, to deciding which friends to spend time with, our kids are faced with important decisions on a regular basis.

And as parents, so are we. We can choose to helicopter-parent, hovering over our child’s every choice until they graduate high school, or we can take the time to train them in Biblical discernment now, so that when the decisions get even more tough, they have the skills they need to make a good choice.

Don’t we want children who are confident in what they believe, who can examine a situation and see the good and the bad, and make their decisions accordingly?

That doesn’t just happen at some point when they get older.

It happens little by little, at home with a mom or dad who invest in teaching their children the skill of discernment.

1 Thessalonians 5:21-22 tells us that we must “examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good; abstain from every form of evil.”

Hold fast to the good, and abstain from every form of evil. But in order to do that, we need to know what IS good, and what IS evil, right?

How you can teach discernment to your children, no matter their age:

Biblical discernment begins with the Bible. Our kids have to know Scripture if they are going to view the world through it’s lens.

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This sounds more daunting than it actually is, so let me reassure you. To teach your kids the Bible you don’t have to be a Biblical scholar. You just have to open your Bible, together with your child, and read it.

Here are a few ideas:

1. Set a time each day to read the Bible with your child. Maybe over breakfast, or before bed. Read through the ACTUAL BIBLE, and talk about what you’re reading. If they have a question you don’t know the answer to, look it up together. You don’t have to know everything, you just have to be willing to learn.
2. Talk about discernment when you’re making decisions. When you make decisions as a parent, or as a family, talk through the process with your kids. Allow them to see how you approach a decision, how you think and pray about it, and what conclusion you come to & why.
3. Choose a “filter” verse for your family to memorize. I constantly quote Philippians 4:8 to my children. “Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” I also turn that verse into questions – Is it true? Is it honorable? Is it pure? Is it lovely? These questions help my kids filter their decisions through the lens of Scripture.

Ultimately, of course, our children belong to the Lord, not to us. We can’t control them, and we can’t force them to make good decisions, as much as we want to. Chances are, they’re going to make some pretty hefty mistakes along their way, just as we did during our growing up years.

But I also believe that what Scripture says is true, and there is deep, life-long value in training up our children in the way they should go.

Discernment: The most important thing we can teach our kids today.

I realize that we have only been talking about My Little Ponies, for goodness sake, but ponies are where it starts.

Kids today are met with WAY more choices than any kid of any previous generation, ever. Between the internet, social media, modern technology, and more – our children are growing up in the most privileged generation on the planet.

In this culture of “personal truths” and the “everyone is right” mentality, it is crucial that our children understand that there is only one Truth – and that’s the truth found in Scripture. Whether we’re in the stages of cartoon ponies, or teenage peer pressure, we MUST equip our children to determine what is right, and stand confidently, even if they are standing alone.

Download our 5 Simple Strategies for Teaching Discernment at Home!

When it comes to teaching discernment to your kids, it’s nice to have an easy place to start! Download our quick start guide to teaching discernment & get a few great parenting tips, along with a few important questions to ask your kids as you teach discernment in your home.